No Person Has Been Fired Or Non-Renewed

On April 14, 2009, someone sent an email from KY's account containing the following statement:
It is very important for everyone at Edison to understand that no faculty member or no administrator or classified employee has been non-renewed or fired. According to the union contract and board policy, any employee that may not be renewed next year must be notified 90-days before the end of the budget year, or April 1. (Emphasis added).
KY reiterated that obtuse and internally contradictory statement at the following Board meeting. In public. Before God and everybody. So, yesterday, the below comes from Linda Peltier, Edison's Strategeric Director of Human Resources:
I would like to take a moment to address your concerns regarding the non-renewal letters. I understand that there are a lot of questions, so I will answer those questions that have been brought to my attention and I encourage you to ask further questions as they come up. (For those who have seen Larry's original email, you know these questions have been subtly reworded.)

1. When does your health insurance expire? How do you file for COBRA?

As long as you are employed at Edison, with or without a contract, and/or are receiving a paycheck, you will be covered by our health insurance. For example, faculty are paid through August 15, therefore, they remain on our payroll and are covered by our health insurance through August 15. (Emphasis added.)

If for some reason you are not issued another contract once the budget has been finalized, then the HR department will forward you COBRA information. (Isn't COBRA issued for people who have been fired?) Under President Obama’s Economic Stimulus Package, any employee who has been dismissed from employment between September 1, 2008, and December 31, 2009, is eligible to choose to continue group health benefits provided by their group health plan for up to 18 months. Historically, the employee has 100% responsibility of the COBRA cost, however, with the stimulus package, a covered employee is only responsible for 35% of the COBRA premium for 9 months and the employer is responsible for the other 65% of the COBRA premium, which is then applied as a credit against payroll taxes.

2. Will your salary be renegotiated? Will salaries be kept “as is” prior to non-renewal or will cuts take place with the new contract?

There is no guarantee that salaries will remain at the level prior to non-renewal. (Emphasis added. How can we have non-renewals when no one has been non-renewed?)

3. If employees are to be renewed, what is their status as far as continuation of contract?

There is no guarantee of a continuation of contract. (Both this question and the previous one concede people who received notice have been non-renewed, or, as we used to say back in the day, fired.)

4. Will positions be kept intact as well as their descriptions?

Job descriptions can change at any time even without the current economic conditions. Some positions may be combined. (This means one of our Deans may be rehired as a cashier, or given that job at any time.)

5. Will vacation and/or sick accrual be kept the same?

Yes, your vacation and/or sick accruals be kept the same. (What does this mean, for God's sake? Does it mean they stop accruing? "The same?" What does it mean? Help?! Nonresponsive.)

6. Can unemployment be collected and if so, for how long? What is the process for unemployment if needed?

Yes, you can collect unemployment. To file for unemployment you can call 1-877-644-6562 or file on-line at I understand that filing on-line is faster. Under the stimulus package, benefits have been extended. Please visit the unemployment web site for further information. (This response makes the Editorial Junta want to punch ourselves in the head over and over and over and over. KY told us no one had been non-renewed or fired. He said this live, on video, at a Board Meeting, before fifty people. How the...ack! Arg! can we get unemployment unless we've been non-renewed of fired!? It's one thing to be evil; it's another to not make any sense at all.)

7. Do you need to apply for unemployment as of June 30?

You can only file for unemployment if you are no longer employed by Edison. (Emphasis added. Above it's said we can file for unemployment if we're non-renewed! And if we can only file for unemployment if we're no longer employed by Edison, then by the tenets of basic logic, to which folks with M.A.'s in philosophy from Notre Dame ought to be privy, non-renewal = no longer employed--and how many of our readers received NOTICE OF NON-RENEWAL?) If you are still working, even without a contract, you cannot file for unemployment. (The whole paragraph is a tautology.)

Once again, I encourage you to communicate and ask questions. Feel free to contact me by e-mail, stop by my office, or give me a call at ext. 7802.

Linda M. Peltier
Executive Director
President's Office and Strategic HR
Edison Community College
1973 Edison Drive
Piqua, OH 45356
Fax 937-778-9700

CONFIDENTIALITY: The information contained in this transmission may contain privileged and confidential information. It is intended only for the use of the person(s) named above. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any review, dissemination, distribution or duplication of this communication, and the information contained in it, is strictly prohibited. If you are not the intended recipient, please contact the sender and immediately destroy all copies of the original message.
Our. President. Is. A. Damn. Liar.

And he makes one of everyone who follows his orders.


Anonymous said...


Say what? How can someone be employed without a contract? Goes hand in hand with being non-renewed but not dismissed or fired.

No guarantee on salaries? Of course, no guarantee on jobs either.

No guarantee on continuations? Is that a chain saw I hear running?

Yes job descriptions can change. But if you play your marbles right you'll get a $30k raise.

The less sense one makes, the less likely to be help accountable for one's actions.

Is there such a thing as repetitive temporary insanity?

How about temporary strategeric ridiculousity?

Is doublespeak without shame?

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. And yes.

Anonymous said...

Who's on first? I don't know. Right!

except there's nothing funny about all this funny business

Anonymous said...

One wonders if LP and KY sent letters of non-non-renewal to themselves, and whether their salaries are considered "not guaranteed at the prior level". It occurs to one that quite a big chunk of the much-lamented reduction in anticipated state assistance levels could be accounted for with modest renegotiation of a handful of very generously compensated individuals.

Anonymous said...


A lie is a lie by any other name is a lie.

Yes, no, yes, maybe, of course, it is difficult to say, but rest assured you can not know.

Is Alice looking through the looking glass?

Anonymous said...

That's some letter. Wonder where the Strategeric Wonder got her book learning? Oh. Or all that HR expertise? Oh. Surely we can rely upon everything she's telling us. Oh. Don't you feel better knowing all this? Oh. Uh oh.
And on July 1?
And on Aug 15?
Long summer coming.

Anonymous said...

Where is the salary information posted?